154.6 lbs
38.1% Fat
26.1 BMI
7.4 Lost
------------
Day 9.
I get to say it today! Under 20 pounds left to lose! However, the actual number is OVER 19 pounds... so the line is fine. A victory non the less.
Today is one of those days that I am not only counting pounds, but my blessings as well. One of those days that I really miss my husband. I can't hold my baby enough. I am thankful for my health. And so grateful for all of God's blessings.
Thursday, May 27, 2010
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Detour
155.8 lbs
38.5% Fat
26.3 BMI
6.2 Lost
1.6 Gained
-------------
Day 8.
38.5% Fat
26.3 BMI
6.2 Lost
1.6 Gained
-------------
Day 8.
I got in a fight with an apple fritter- and I lost. Let me set the scene. It's dinner time on Day 7. Hadn't slipped once in a weeks time. I decided to reward myself. The hubby offers to pick up my favorite sushi roll. I take it a step further and say, "If you decide you want to pick me up an apple fritter at the donut place while you are waiting for the roll.. that would be fine with me too."
Short story shorter, 1.6 POUNDS GAINED!
I stumbled upon a detour, but I am back on course. On this Day 8, I have another 7 days on the RAW detox. I am proud to say that I am now only 20.8 pounds away from my goal weight. That is at least less than what my baby weighs. (If you are following me, you might remember my epiphany on Day 2.) It is saddening, however, to know that if I had stayed focused, I would instead be telling you that I now had under 20 pounds to lose.
But something great happened. A mouth-watering apple fritter, quickly turned into a fantastic reminder of why I want to eat cleaner. Much like Eve's sinful apple, my apple fritter lacked it's promises. The intoxicating smell, was better than the taste. So here I begin this second half with a refreshed motivation to stay on track.
I wonder then, what will be next. The South Beach Diet is a possible fit. A diet filled with some of the similar foods I have been enjoying raw... but I could then eat them grilled! Now there is a reward that never lacks what's promised. My husbands grilling.
Tuesday, May 25, 2010
Chardonnay
154.2 lbs
38.9% Fat
26.1 BMI
7.8 lbs Lost
--------------
Day 7.
Mamma had a few Chardonnays. I accompanied a friend to a 'Ladies Party' up the street last night. It's a rare occasion when I don't have to drive, so I thought I would take the opportunity to indulge in a few glasses of wine. After all, the baby was in good hands at home with her Daddy... or so I thought.
It was some what of a buzz kill when I was dropped off at home, to find that my family had also just returned home. They had gone to visit a friend shortly after I left the house. While I don't care that they went, I was really uncomfortable that I didn't know about it.
As a mom, I want to know where my baby is at all times. There is a sense of security knowing that your family is home safe. To find out I was out enjoying myself with a false sense of security, left me with an uneasy feeling. As I was warding off the guilt that was trying to take over my buzz, I expressed to my husband in my sweetest and most stern voice, "Honey... Don't ever do that again. I want a phone call!" I proceeded to state my case, "I carried her inside of me for over 9 months, I have only been apart from her a handful of hours in her whole life! I just need to know where she is... when to worry." He laughed at me a little and agreed. I mean really... who is going to poke the Mamma Bear?
I realize that this makes me sound a bit uptight. With that said, being a parent means you will always have the thought of your child in the back of your head. I might physically be at a get together, sipping on a glass of wine and munching on a celery stick... but I am mentally thinking, 'It's 7:30- she's having her bedtime milk.'
The second she was put into my arms on the day she was born, an overwhelming feeling of responsibility filled me through and through. That's not something that you can just put out of your mind, even when you know she is in the best hands.
38.9% Fat
26.1 BMI
7.8 lbs Lost
--------------
Day 7.
Mamma had a few Chardonnays. I accompanied a friend to a 'Ladies Party' up the street last night. It's a rare occasion when I don't have to drive, so I thought I would take the opportunity to indulge in a few glasses of wine. After all, the baby was in good hands at home with her Daddy... or so I thought.
It was some what of a buzz kill when I was dropped off at home, to find that my family had also just returned home. They had gone to visit a friend shortly after I left the house. While I don't care that they went, I was really uncomfortable that I didn't know about it.
As a mom, I want to know where my baby is at all times. There is a sense of security knowing that your family is home safe. To find out I was out enjoying myself with a false sense of security, left me with an uneasy feeling. As I was warding off the guilt that was trying to take over my buzz, I expressed to my husband in my sweetest and most stern voice, "Honey... Don't ever do that again. I want a phone call!" I proceeded to state my case, "I carried her inside of me for over 9 months, I have only been apart from her a handful of hours in her whole life! I just need to know where she is... when to worry." He laughed at me a little and agreed. I mean really... who is going to poke the Mamma Bear?
I realize that this makes me sound a bit uptight. With that said, being a parent means you will always have the thought of your child in the back of your head. I might physically be at a get together, sipping on a glass of wine and munching on a celery stick... but I am mentally thinking, 'It's 7:30- she's having her bedtime milk.'
The second she was put into my arms on the day she was born, an overwhelming feeling of responsibility filled me through and through. That's not something that you can just put out of your mind, even when you know she is in the best hands.
Monday, May 24, 2010
Tiny Hugs
154.6 lbs
38.8% Fat
26.1 BMI
7.4 lbs Lost
-------------
Day 6.
I am convinced that the cure to all the sadness, worry and stress in the world; lies between my daughters little arms. Her tiny hugs around my neck fill my heart with pure bliss. It's a feeling only a parent knows. As the emotion of creating this little person warms me from head to toe... there is no longer room for toxic thoughts to enter my mind.
Staying focused on this detox and renewal of myself, is easier because I have this little girl to look at all day. A reminder that I need to be the best I can be, for her. When I feel as though I am about to raid the cabinet for some carbs... I can look at her for all the motivation I need... and hug my way to a stronger moment.
My life became precious when she entered this world. I am special, because I get to be her Mom.
38.8% Fat
26.1 BMI
7.4 lbs Lost
-------------
Day 6.
I am convinced that the cure to all the sadness, worry and stress in the world; lies between my daughters little arms. Her tiny hugs around my neck fill my heart with pure bliss. It's a feeling only a parent knows. As the emotion of creating this little person warms me from head to toe... there is no longer room for toxic thoughts to enter my mind.
Staying focused on this detox and renewal of myself, is easier because I have this little girl to look at all day. A reminder that I need to be the best I can be, for her. When I feel as though I am about to raid the cabinet for some carbs... I can look at her for all the motivation I need... and hug my way to a stronger moment.
My life became precious when she entered this world. I am special, because I get to be her Mom.
Witchy Woman
155.2 lbs
39.2% Fat
26.2 BMI
6.8 lbs Lost
--------------
Day 5.
It only took a few beats before the crowd stood to their feet when the Eagles began playing Witchy Woman. A Seinfeld fan myself, I can't help but think of Elaine whenever I hear this song. As I began playing the scene over again in my head, my husband looks over at me and says, "Did you ever see that Seinfeld where Elaine tries to make this her song?" No doubt a thought running through at least half of the minds in the amphitheater at that same moment.
Speaking of Elaine... My husband and I were so lucky to pick a patch of lawn next to the Eagles' biggest fan. A lady who couldn't contain her excitement. She was moving her body in every direction, to every beat, of every song. We had the best seats in the house. And just when we thought it couldn't get any better, a lost and intoxicated man separated from his friends, stumbles up to her and begins dancing to the beat of a song that only they could hear. While it looked like a grasshopper mating with a bird... it was refreshing to watch. To see two people enjoying themselves to the fullest without a care in the world.
Watching this phenomenon known as the Eagles, snuggled up in blankets with my husband, warming each other from the cold; it seemed as though time stood still. Even though hundreds of people were around us, it felt as though it was only us. I felt honored to be watching this talent perform in front of me. To be carried away with the energy of the amphitheater, with memories of camping trips, road trips and Barbecues filling my mind.
The power of music, and it's amazing effect on the soul- it's a gift. A gift wrapped up in this perfect package of romance and memories... tied with the most amazing shooting star that I have ever seen. It was an incredible night. Happy birthday, honey!
39.2% Fat
26.2 BMI
6.8 lbs Lost
--------------
Day 5.
It only took a few beats before the crowd stood to their feet when the Eagles began playing Witchy Woman. A Seinfeld fan myself, I can't help but think of Elaine whenever I hear this song. As I began playing the scene over again in my head, my husband looks over at me and says, "Did you ever see that Seinfeld where Elaine tries to make this her song?" No doubt a thought running through at least half of the minds in the amphitheater at that same moment.
Speaking of Elaine... My husband and I were so lucky to pick a patch of lawn next to the Eagles' biggest fan. A lady who couldn't contain her excitement. She was moving her body in every direction, to every beat, of every song. We had the best seats in the house. And just when we thought it couldn't get any better, a lost and intoxicated man separated from his friends, stumbles up to her and begins dancing to the beat of a song that only they could hear. While it looked like a grasshopper mating with a bird... it was refreshing to watch. To see two people enjoying themselves to the fullest without a care in the world.
Watching this phenomenon known as the Eagles, snuggled up in blankets with my husband, warming each other from the cold; it seemed as though time stood still. Even though hundreds of people were around us, it felt as though it was only us. I felt honored to be watching this talent perform in front of me. To be carried away with the energy of the amphitheater, with memories of camping trips, road trips and Barbecues filling my mind.
The power of music, and it's amazing effect on the soul- it's a gift. A gift wrapped up in this perfect package of romance and memories... tied with the most amazing shooting star that I have ever seen. It was an incredible night. Happy birthday, honey!
Saturday, May 22, 2010
Hotel California
156.2 lbs
39.6 %Fat
26.8 BMI
5.8 lbs Lost
------------
Day 4.
On a mission for romance.
As a birthday gift to my husband, I bought the two of us tickets to The Eagles concert. We know every word to most of their songs, and have many fond memories attached to them. Truth be told, there is no better road trip music. (unless you are in a car full of girlfriends. In which case you are belting out Jewel at the top of your lungs!)
The Plan:The car seat is coming out of the car. I'll put the seats down and make a nice inviting bed in the back of our SUV. Don't get me wrong- the whole backseat thing is sexy... but I am making a plan here. Maybe even use some shoe polish to write 'Hotel California' on the back window... cheesy? Well... I would love it!
I'll pack up an ice chest with a few of his favorite things... some Tequila, some beer, a sandwich, and some other munchies for him. (Carrot sticks for me. Damn this diet!) I'll plan to leave for the show early so we have time to tail-gate a little... in and out of the car.
I am a romantic at heart. As a stay at home mom, I don't get very many opportunities to go big for my man anymore. Those paychecks with my name on it really helped the sneak factor before. The baby is staying at home with Grandpa, and I am taking advantage of every moment of it!
He's got the best of my love.
39.6 %Fat
26.8 BMI
5.8 lbs Lost
------------
Day 4.
On a mission for romance.
As a birthday gift to my husband, I bought the two of us tickets to The Eagles concert. We know every word to most of their songs, and have many fond memories attached to them. Truth be told, there is no better road trip music. (unless you are in a car full of girlfriends. In which case you are belting out Jewel at the top of your lungs!)
The Plan:The car seat is coming out of the car. I'll put the seats down and make a nice inviting bed in the back of our SUV. Don't get me wrong- the whole backseat thing is sexy... but I am making a plan here. Maybe even use some shoe polish to write 'Hotel California' on the back window... cheesy? Well... I would love it!
I'll pack up an ice chest with a few of his favorite things... some Tequila, some beer, a sandwich, and some other munchies for him. (Carrot sticks for me. Damn this diet!) I'll plan to leave for the show early so we have time to tail-gate a little... in and out of the car.
I am a romantic at heart. As a stay at home mom, I don't get very many opportunities to go big for my man anymore. Those paychecks with my name on it really helped the sneak factor before. The baby is staying at home with Grandpa, and I am taking advantage of every moment of it!
He's got the best of my love.
Friday, May 21, 2010
The Power of Fantasy
158.4 lbs
39.5% Fat
26.8 BMI
----------
Day 3.
Fantasy. It's a pretty powerful tool. While my reality plays a mean defense, my fantasy can manage to get in a few touchdowns from time to time.
I am a thinker. Thinking seems to get in the way of ALL the fun stuff! Thinking in the bedroom is never a good thing. And while I know this... I often find myself thinking about how I am thinking, when I should be in the moment with my husband. I will say however, I am also a multitasker, because I am still enjoying myself and feeling good...and managing to make him feel good, all at the same time.
Getting to the 'Big O'. Trust me when I say the problem is me, not him. He is truly the one and only who has ever given me a mind blowing experience... and he does this on a regular basis. The trouble is that I get in the way of myself. One moment I am kissing my way down below the belt with thoughts of my mouth on him, and his hands on me... and then BAM! Suddenly without warning, I am sorting through bills in my head.
My favorite, and by favorite I mean most hated, is when his hand finds it's way to my mushy spots. Once able to reposition myself to stretch out those unfavored areas... after the baby- it is what it is. Mushy. And there is no camouflaging it. Right then.. the negative self-talk begins and I fall out of the moment. Do men experience this? Or is it another one of Life's jokes meant only for women? So there it happens again... reality.
Thankfully, there are Victoria's Secret commercials! Am I imagining those beautiful ladies? No. I am imagining those beautiful ladies' bodies, with my head on them! I don't fantasize about other men. I fantasize about my man doing dirty things to me... and in those moments... I 'borrow' a body. While my weight is ever so present on my mind on this Day 3 of my renewal, I am grateful to those gorgeous women for giving me the visual I sometimes need while doing the deed.
Making sure we sneak in a session between the sheets, and make it to the finish line isn't always easy as parents. And it's harder as a woman I think, and even more so as a mom... to just flip the switch to 'On' when a moment presents itself. Between changing diapers and wiping the spit-up off of you, a little fantasy can offer the sexiness needed to get your head in the game.
At least with your partner, fantasy can become reality. As it should.
39.5% Fat
26.8 BMI
----------
Day 3.
Fantasy. It's a pretty powerful tool. While my reality plays a mean defense, my fantasy can manage to get in a few touchdowns from time to time.
I am a thinker. Thinking seems to get in the way of ALL the fun stuff! Thinking in the bedroom is never a good thing. And while I know this... I often find myself thinking about how I am thinking, when I should be in the moment with my husband. I will say however, I am also a multitasker, because I am still enjoying myself and feeling good...and managing to make him feel good, all at the same time.
Getting to the 'Big O'. Trust me when I say the problem is me, not him. He is truly the one and only who has ever given me a mind blowing experience... and he does this on a regular basis. The trouble is that I get in the way of myself. One moment I am kissing my way down below the belt with thoughts of my mouth on him, and his hands on me... and then BAM! Suddenly without warning, I am sorting through bills in my head.
My favorite, and by favorite I mean most hated, is when his hand finds it's way to my mushy spots. Once able to reposition myself to stretch out those unfavored areas... after the baby- it is what it is. Mushy. And there is no camouflaging it. Right then.. the negative self-talk begins and I fall out of the moment. Do men experience this? Or is it another one of Life's jokes meant only for women? So there it happens again... reality.
Thankfully, there are Victoria's Secret commercials! Am I imagining those beautiful ladies? No. I am imagining those beautiful ladies' bodies, with my head on them! I don't fantasize about other men. I fantasize about my man doing dirty things to me... and in those moments... I 'borrow' a body. While my weight is ever so present on my mind on this Day 3 of my renewal, I am grateful to those gorgeous women for giving me the visual I sometimes need while doing the deed.
Making sure we sneak in a session between the sheets, and make it to the finish line isn't always easy as parents. And it's harder as a woman I think, and even more so as a mom... to just flip the switch to 'On' when a moment presents itself. Between changing diapers and wiping the spit-up off of you, a little fantasy can offer the sexiness needed to get your head in the game.
At least with your partner, fantasy can become reality. As it should.
Thursday, May 20, 2010
I Ate a Toddler
160 lbs
39.8 % Fat
27 BMI
2 lbs lost
-----------
Day 2.
My husband weighed our 14 month old bundle of joy last night. She is now 23lbs. As I held her... I began to think- I have to lose the equivalent of a 14 month old baby! In fact, I have to lose more than that!
I now have a visual and physical reference. It's kind of like the challenge on the show, 'The Biggest Loser', when the contestants have to climb a ladder with a backpack filled with the amount of weight they have lost- and then again without it. For them, a reminder of where they were. For me, a reminder of where I need to be.
I am proud to say that Day 1 was a success! The RAW food diet will probably be the hardest part of this challenge. While I did feel satisfied, when the end of the day came I was quietly wishing for the comfort of a warm meal. So, I had some hot tea.
39.8 % Fat
27 BMI
2 lbs lost
-----------
Day 2.
My husband weighed our 14 month old bundle of joy last night. She is now 23lbs. As I held her... I began to think- I have to lose the equivalent of a 14 month old baby! In fact, I have to lose more than that!
I now have a visual and physical reference. It's kind of like the challenge on the show, 'The Biggest Loser', when the contestants have to climb a ladder with a backpack filled with the amount of weight they have lost- and then again without it. For them, a reminder of where they were. For me, a reminder of where I need to be.
I am proud to say that Day 1 was a success! The RAW food diet will probably be the hardest part of this challenge. While I did feel satisfied, when the end of the day came I was quietly wishing for the comfort of a warm meal. So, I had some hot tea.
Wednesday, May 19, 2010
The Starting Line
162.0 Lbs
39.9 % Fat
27.3 BMI
---------------
Here I am! Day one. Starting out on my adventure to find myself again. Like many first time moms... I have found myself without... well... myself. Clearly no one's fault but my own. A once very confident, careerminded and health conscious woman, became less than desirable to herself. Which is not something I want for my daughter, or my husband.
The Confession: I would describe myself as, not a control 'freak', but someone who likes to be in control. Slowly.. since the birth of my baby 14 months ago... I have been spiralling OUT of control.
It's not as though I woke up this morning and looked in the mirror wondering what had happened to me. (except for the morning I woke up to a pair of flat and saggy boobs after weaning my baby. Hey- at least they are a pair, right?)
It's more like one morning I woke to the very early sounds of a waking baby, went to change her diaper and the last wipe had been used. Went to get my coffee, but had to wash a cup first. Woke up another morning to several loads of laundry I had been putting off. Got into my car one day to find empty water bottles on the floor and trash tossed about everywhere. Fell asleep several nights in a row without that 'one on one' time with my husband. To recently putting on the maternity jeans I am still wearing... to find that they are to tight!
Am I a career Mom with no time and energy left in her day for dusting, dishes, laundry, workouts and sex after a 9 to 5 job? No! I am a stay at home Mom, with an amazing husband who actually enjoys cooking for me! I have just been lazy- and it got easier and easier everyday.
The Journey: The first step- I need an attitude adjustment! I am taking a step back to jot down the things that are IN my control and the things that are OUT of my control. And most importantly- I will accept it.
Gone are the days that I go to bed without completing my chores! There will no longer be dishes in the sink. No longer a messy living room to wake up to. No longer 5 loads of laundry waiting to be washed. No longer an un-made bed to crawl into at days end. These things I CAN control.
Which brings me to keeping my husband happy! We have a great sex life. However, since I have been out of shape over the last few months, the romance has also been out of the bedroom. I suddenly lack confidence. I lack sexiness. I am committing to taking care of my man again! I am committing to taking care of myself, for myself and for my husband. I will maintain myself again! Doing the hair, putting on the make-up, the clothes... AND... just as important... letting the 'mommy hair' down, taking off the make-up, and taking off the clothes!
Last, the several half-hearted attempts at losing "the baby weight" stops now! Day one began this morning, and so did my 2-week detox plan. Only RAW fruits and veggies for the next 14-days. The workout? Along with salsa dancing with my baby girl, a daily 45-minute walk and a Pilate's program will be my new ritual.
I chose the name Mamma a`la mode because that is what I am. A Mom- but reminding myself that I am so much more! And thanks to all the pie I ate a`la mode while pregnant... I have 27 pounds to lose!
I am renewing myself. And I am holding myself accountable here!
39.9 % Fat
27.3 BMI
---------------
Here I am! Day one. Starting out on my adventure to find myself again. Like many first time moms... I have found myself without... well... myself. Clearly no one's fault but my own. A once very confident, careerminded and health conscious woman, became less than desirable to herself. Which is not something I want for my daughter, or my husband.
The Confession: I would describe myself as, not a control 'freak', but someone who likes to be in control. Slowly.. since the birth of my baby 14 months ago... I have been spiralling OUT of control.
It's not as though I woke up this morning and looked in the mirror wondering what had happened to me. (except for the morning I woke up to a pair of flat and saggy boobs after weaning my baby. Hey- at least they are a pair, right?)
It's more like one morning I woke to the very early sounds of a waking baby, went to change her diaper and the last wipe had been used. Went to get my coffee, but had to wash a cup first. Woke up another morning to several loads of laundry I had been putting off. Got into my car one day to find empty water bottles on the floor and trash tossed about everywhere. Fell asleep several nights in a row without that 'one on one' time with my husband. To recently putting on the maternity jeans I am still wearing... to find that they are to tight!
Am I a career Mom with no time and energy left in her day for dusting, dishes, laundry, workouts and sex after a 9 to 5 job? No! I am a stay at home Mom, with an amazing husband who actually enjoys cooking for me! I have just been lazy- and it got easier and easier everyday.
The Journey: The first step- I need an attitude adjustment! I am taking a step back to jot down the things that are IN my control and the things that are OUT of my control. And most importantly- I will accept it.
Gone are the days that I go to bed without completing my chores! There will no longer be dishes in the sink. No longer a messy living room to wake up to. No longer 5 loads of laundry waiting to be washed. No longer an un-made bed to crawl into at days end. These things I CAN control.
Which brings me to keeping my husband happy! We have a great sex life. However, since I have been out of shape over the last few months, the romance has also been out of the bedroom. I suddenly lack confidence. I lack sexiness. I am committing to taking care of my man again! I am committing to taking care of myself, for myself and for my husband. I will maintain myself again! Doing the hair, putting on the make-up, the clothes... AND... just as important... letting the 'mommy hair' down, taking off the make-up, and taking off the clothes!
Last, the several half-hearted attempts at losing "the baby weight" stops now! Day one began this morning, and so did my 2-week detox plan. Only RAW fruits and veggies for the next 14-days. The workout? Along with salsa dancing with my baby girl, a daily 45-minute walk and a Pilate's program will be my new ritual.
I chose the name Mamma a`la mode because that is what I am. A Mom- but reminding myself that I am so much more! And thanks to all the pie I ate a`la mode while pregnant... I have 27 pounds to lose!
I am renewing myself. And I am holding myself accountable here!
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